Core Value - Friendship

"Bet you've made alot of friends on this walk?

I am not sure they're friends, I say.

But I've met alot of people I'm gonna miss.

Yeah, he says, licking the cigarette again.

People come and people go.

But friends are hard to find."

-Jerry Ellis, Walking the Trail

Nothing but heaven itself is better than a friend who is really a friend.

--Plautus

We call that person who has lost his father, an orphan;

and a widower that man who has lost his wife.

But that man who has known the immense unhappiness

of losing a friend, by what name do we call him?

Here every language is silent and holds its peace in impotence.

--Joseph Roux

In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out.

It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being.

We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.

--Albert Schweitzer

 

Saint Thomas Aquinas wrote, “There is nothing on this earth more to be prized than true friendship.” How about you? What value do you place on “friendship?” Even more importantly, how do you define “friendship?” Friend and friendship are two very important, even sacred, words and concepts in the life of the writer. He neither calls someone “friend,” nor entertains entering into a “friendship” relationship without great reflection and a great deal of caution. He believes that both terms, and their supporting conceptualizations, have been reduced to mere social hyperbole by many in our society. Of course, as always, it is up to the reader to determine the meaning and value of these words and concepts, but the writer would simply ask each individual reader to take some time to truly evaluate the friendships in his/her life, and determine the depth and breadth of the associated relationships.

The late theologian Henri Nouwen observed, “When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.” In a similar framing of friendship, Samuel Johnson noted, "We cannot tell the precise moment when friendship is formed. As in filling a vessel drop by drop, there is at last a drop which makes it run over; so in a series of kindnesses there is at last one which makes the heart run over." Ever hear the phrase “quick friends?” In such a case are we more accurate saying “we quickly came to like each other,” or something of comparable social worth? The ancient Greek philosopher, Aristotle, knew of this human motivation and shared, “Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow ripening fruit.”

In our contemporary, fast paced, instant gratification world, anything requiring patience and investment of effort seems so contrary to where we are going as a species. Perhaps those of us who are totally committed to living in such a world are satisfied with shallow relationships. Hopefully, there are still a few among us who believe that a relationship with another warrants what is necessary to make it truly lasting and meaningful. As Aristotle noted, "What is a friend? A single soul in two bodies." What is your reaction or response to that thought? Does being a friend to, and with, someone carry that level of credential? It does for the writer. That is why he believes it to be so sacred; inviolate. St. Jerome was quoted as saying, “The friendship that can cease has never been real.” These are powerful thoughts handed down over the centuries by some of humankind’s great thinkers. But, if their words seem to weigh on your mind a bit too heavily, then consider the line from The Little Rascals, "You only meet your once in a lifetime friend... once in a lifetime." Or, as the line from Fried Green Tomatoes expresses it, "You just reminded me of what's really important in life, friends, best friends."

Regardless of the scales one uses to determine the meaning and value of friendship, it would seem safe to speculate that most friendships are spawned by a parentage of need, a need for something or someone. Antoine de Sainte-Exupery believed, "There is no hope of joy except in human relations." Yet, as Charles Caleb Colton observed, "True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost." James Fenimore Cooper believed that friendship was literally the wellspring of a person’s life, noting, "Friendship that flows from the heart cannot be frozen by adversity, as the water that flows from the spring cannot congeal in winter."

Our current society frequently tunes into the “success channel” with the intention of getting ahead, accruing wealth and/or status, or living the “good life.” Although social and economic structures try to determine the measures of human success, each of us has the opportunity to measure success in our own lives. Edward Everett Hale believed that friendship plays an important role in determining an individual’s success stating, "The making of friends, who are real friends, is the best token we have of a man's success in life." Aristotle expressed much the same sentiment in these words, "Without friends no one would choose to live, though he had all other goods." For both Hale and Aristotle, the value of friendship would approach the state of being immeasurable. In measuring the value of friends in your life, are your scales similar to those used Hale and Aristotle?

The writer does not wish to diminish the “success mentality,” only urge the reader to examine what success truly means in one’s life, and how it contributes to the fulfillment of the individual’s purpose in life. Anais Nin believed, "Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born." If one is open to the intimacy that friendship brings, s/he might prefer Fred Rogers’ take on friendship, “If you’re trusted and people will allow you to share their inner garden...what better gift?"

 

Henry David Thoreau understood the gift that friendship represented in one’s interactions with another. He wrote, "The most I can do for my friend is simply to be his friend. I have no wealth to bestow on him. If he knows that I am happy in loving him, he will want no other reward. Is not friendship divine in this?" The words of Thoreau hold great power for the writer. Thoreau recognized the spiritual value of such an intimate relationship with another; its divinity. Thoreau also noted, “The language of friendship is not words but meanings.” One also needs to remember the power of a gift is that is affects both the giver and receiver. Walt Whitman reflected upon the importance of friendship from the recipient’s perspective when he shared, "I no doubt deserved my enemies, but I don't believe I deserved my friends." If the thoughts shared above in this paragraph don’t move you at least a little bit emotionally, then perhaps as comedian Joan Rivers likes to say, “We need to talk!

For those who do not wish to enter into a consideration of the ethereal, spiritual, value of friendship, perhaps a more hedonistic perspective such as that of Robert Louis Stevenson might prove to be more practical; "A friend is a gift you give yourself." Examining things from the flip perspective, contemporary writer Richard Bach wrote, "Every gift from a friend is a wish for your happiness..." Or getting down to the bottom tier of Bloom’s Taxonomy, C. S. Lewis conjectured, "Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather is one of those things that give value to survival."

Friendship to George Eliot held a similar survival quality as shared in his thought, "No soul is desolate as long as there is a human being for whom it can feel trust and reverence." Similarly, Anatole Broyard offered, "When friends stop being frank and useful to each other, the whole world loses some of its radiance." This last statement, and perhaps the whole exchange on friendship, may irritate those who cling to the delusion of being “self-made.” Like it or not, we are going to influence and affect others, as we are going to be influenced and affected by others. The positive influence of friendship would seem preferable to that of something less positive.

However, the concept of friendship does not come without certain cautions. As the Buddha realized, “An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind.” At first blush, the Buddha’s statement might give those wary of friendship grounds for their perspective. Instead, the writer would suggest, the Buddha’s comment guides us back to the beginning of our discussion of friendship, and the importance of determining the true value of friendship and the precautions needed to be observed before endearing someone by referring to them as “friend.” The writer believes Oliver Wendell Holmes, comes closer to his take on the Buddha’s precautionary message when he wrote, "Except in cases of necessity, which are rare, leave your friend to learn unpleasant things from his enemies; they are ready enough to tell them."

The only way to have a friend is to be one.

--Ralph Waldo Emerson

As with all entries, we believe we are obligated to apply the topic being examined to the lives of children. Friends, and friendships, are something readily observable as being important to children. As teachers and mentors – please remember all of us are teachers and mentors – we must first become friends with ourselves. Eleanor Roosevelt believed, "Friendship with oneself is all-important because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world." To some that observation might seem absurd, but reflect upon it for awhile and perhaps its true meaning and importance might begin to take root in your heart and mind. Are we at peace with ourselves? Are we friends with ourselves, or are we truly our own worst enemy?

Henry Ford stated, "My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me." John Boyle O'Reilly expands Ford’s thought noting, "Too late we learn, a man must hold his friend unjudged, accepted, trusted to the end." As teachers and mentors, do we have the right to expect others, especially the children under our care, to be friends with themselves and others, if we are not similarly friends with ourselves? Believe what you wish, but the Children’s Champion believes children recognize authenticity when they see and experience it. Our reality in their presence is only masked by our own insecurities and self delusion.

Muhammad Ali observed, “Friendship... is not something you learn in school. But if you haven't learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven't learned anything.” For those of you working in schools, how do you feel about Ali’s comment? Why do you agree or disagree? If you agree, why shouldn’t friendship be part of the curricular menu; an important ingredient? Benjamin Disraeli recognized the value of friendship in his early years noting, "There is magic in the memory of schoolboy friendships; it softens the heart, and even affects the nervous system of those who have no heart." Childhood memories for many among us are much the same as Thomas Jefferson’s, "The happiest moments my heart knows are those in which it is pouring forth its affections to a few esteemed characters." Too late in life, many of us learned what we should have learned and experienced as children. Childhood friendships can add value and meaning to our lives as well as those experienced in adult life. Benjamin Disraeli believed, "The greatest good you can do for another is not just share your riches, but to reveal to him, his own."

Similarly, Goethe observed, "Treat people as if they were what they ought to be and you help them to become what they are capable of being." Much the same, the contemporary icon Cher acknowledged, "I can trust my friends. These people force me to examine, encourage me to grow." The writer contends this relationship between one and his/or her close intimates begins in childhood, and is not reserved only for the adults. Cicero declared, "Thus nature has no love for solitude, and always leans, as it were, on some support; and the sweetest support is found in the most intimate friendship." Are we so selfish and arrogant to believe that which Cicero addresses regarding friendship is reserved only for those who manage to survive childhood? Are we willing to accept Ali’s observation, or do we believe true friendship is something way to important to be left to chance? The choice to nurture friendship among children lies within each of us. We get to choose. You get to choose.

The Children’s Champion believes that helping children to understand and explore the concepts of friends and friendships is both a duty and obligation. As adults we come to recognize the value a “true friend” can add to our lives. Just think how powerful a benefit we can add to our children’s development by, at least, helping them to explore these concepts. Bullying has become the contemporary scourge of society. We choose not to get into the debate of what bullying is, or isn’t, in this posting, but the writer would ask the reader to consider this possibility. Would it be more productive to help children understand positive peer interactions, and the benefits of friendship and friendly interactions, rather than to focus on the “don’ts” of getting along with one’s peers. Bullying prevention programs may reduce the number of observable negative social interactions between children – and/or adults – but unless we are willing to genuinely venture into the realm of relationships, true relationships, with children, our attempts at thwarting the inappropriate behaviors we put under the umbrella of “bullying” are often merely suppressed, only to emerge at a later date, rather than remedied. To this thought, we conclude with the words of the Marquise de Sevigne, "True friendship is never serene."

"I'd like to be the sort of friend that you have been to me.

I'd like to be the help that you've been always glad to be;

I'd like to mean as much to you each minute of the day,

as you have meant, old friend of mine,

 to me along the way."

- Edgar A. Guest

Core Value - Honesty

The greatest truth is honesty, and the greatest falsehood is dishonesty.

-- Abu Bakr

"It is discouraging how many people are shocked by honesty

and how few by deceit."

--Noel Coward

Some who read this entry might be confused as to why we are dealing with honesty as a core value when earlier we dedicated an entry to truth. Aren't they one and the same? The writer will leave it to the reader to discern whether s/he equates the two. Honesty, for the writer, puts truth into action; conjunction of noun and verb. Truth, if not applied as honesty, is much the same as knowledge left dormant; neither serves much purpose. Truth holds us accountable. Honesty makes us accountable.
 
Supporting the perspective of honesty as putting truth into action, Johann Wolfgang von Goethe related, “Thinking is easy, acting is difficult, and to put one's thoughts into action is the most difficult thing in the world.” As applied to the concepts of truth and honesty, Spencer Johnson noted, “Integrity is telling myself the truth. And honesty is telling the truth to other people.”

 The person who acknowledges honesty as a core value understands how fundamental honesty is to their definition of "self." It is as much a part of who they are as is any part of their corporal being. It defines who and what they are in all aspects of their lives. The late Mary Kay Ash said of honesty, “Honesty is the cornerstone of all success, without which confidence and ability to perform shall cease to exist.” Similarly, success guru Zig Ziglar observed, "The foundation stones for a balanced success are honesty, character, integrity, faith, love and loyalty."

 One of the fruits of honesty is confidence, both in one's self, and in others' ability to be honest. Franklin D. Roosevelt concluded, "Confidence... thrives on honesty, on honor, on the sacredness of obligations, on faithful protection and on unselfish performance. Without them it cannot live." As tied to personal integrity, Michel de Montaigne wrote, "Confidence in others' honesty is no light testimony of one's own integrity." Having confidence in another's honesty is no small challenge, but if we are unable to do so, then how can we believe in such values as trust and truth? Nathaniel Hawthorne suggested, "All men profess honesty as long as they can. To believe all men honest would be folly. To believe none so is something worse." Our core values must not be treated as step-children. Rather, for any of them to hold meaning, they must be embraced as the sacred offspring of our soul and spirit. If having and honoring core values is considered optional, how can we justify our existence on earth, or our worth in terms of contribution to the human race?

 What stands in the way of honesty? What are we afraid of when we choose to not tell the truth, or lie, rather than to express the truth honestly? Perhaps part of the problem rests in what O. Henry wrote a century ago in Rolling Stones, "There is no well-defined boundary between honesty and dishonesty. The frontiers of one blend with the outside limits of the other, and he who attempts to tread this dangerous ground may be sometimes in one domain and sometimes in the other." As great as one's fear of being honest might be, the alternative would seem even worse. Tad Williams proposed, “We tell lies when we are afraid …afraid of what we don't know, of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing that we fear grows stronger.” Thomas Paine, writing in The Age of Reason, observed, "It is impossible to calculate the moral mischief, if I may so express it, that mental lying has produced in society. When a man has so far corrupted and prostituted the chastity of his mind as to subscribe his professional belief to things he does not believe, he has prepared himself for the commission of every other crime."

 Expanding beyond the boundaries of "self," what is the impact of one's honesty, or dishonesty, on the relationships the person has with others? Ralph Waldo Emerson believed the highest compact a person can make with another human being is, "Let there be truth between us two forevermore." Each party in a relationship must come to it with their own yardstick, or set of scales, to determine its worth. An unknown author noted, "Some people will not tolerate such emotional honesty in communication. They would rather defend their dishonesty on the grounds that it might hurt others. Therefore, having rationalized their phoniness into nobility, they settle for superficial relationships."

 It doesn't take much insight to realize that without honesty in our relationships, there is little, to no, chance for intimacy to exist, or flourish. As Ray Blanton notes, "Honesty does not always bring a response of love, but it is absolutely essential to it." If intimacy is what the person is seeking in a particular relationship, then the words of Goethe might have meaning. He stated, “What is uttered from the heart alone, Will win the hearts of others to your own.” Although Charles Dickens would likely disagree, Paulo Coelho felt, "No one can lie; no one can hide anything, when he looks directly into someone's eyes.” The eyes, as the windows of our soul, are revealing in many ways of their owner. However, one must remember, to look directly into someone's eyes allows the other person to do likewise. As adults we often ask, or demand, a child to "look us in the eye." Remember; when we do so, we may well be opening up a part of us to the child that we might not truly wish to reveal to him, or her. Proceed cautiously, and honestly. As author Richard Bach wrote, "Your conscience is the measure of the honesty of your selfishness. Listen to it carefully."

"It is not difficult to deceive the first time,

for the deceived possesses no antibodies;

unvaccinated by suspicion, she overlooks lateness,

accepts absurd excuses, permits the flimsiest

patching to repair great rents in the quotidian."

~John Updike

The debt of being other than honest can be realized as something even greater; something more universal. Rospo Pallenberg and John Boorman wrote in Excalibur, "When a man lies, he murders some part of the world." Again, buy-in to this perspective is the option of the individual, but, at the very least, it should cause one to pause and reflect for a moment or two about the damage, or possible damage, that s/he may have wreaked if dishonesty was selected in lieu of honesty. It is interesting that the concept of "brutal honesty" has been allowed to become accepted by many as a quality of honesty; one that is best avoided unless we choose to use it as a weapon against another. Certainly, an individual may choose to present some element of truth in such a way to do harm to another. As Bertrand Russell noted, "If we were all given by magic the power to read each other's thoughts, I suppose the first effect would be to dissolve all friendships." The writer chooses to believe that far more friendships are formed, maintained, and, even, salvaged as a result of honesty between individuals than have been damaged or destroyed. Lest we get too Pollyannaish about people's intentions as applied to the use of honesty, we might consider the words of Dave Van Ronk, “Honesty is the cruelest game of all, because not only can you hurt someone - and hurt them to the bone - you can feel self-righteous about it at the same time.” Honesty, much like the scalpel, can heal, or can do serious harm, or even kill a person based on the intention of the one who wields it.

Let's take a closer look at how the core value of honesty plays in our interaction and relationship with children. Interestingly, Oliver Wendell Homes wrote, "Pretty much all the honest truth telling in the world is done by children." In a similar fashion Mira Nair shared, "I always like to reveal the fact that the emperor has no clothes. And children are best at that. They teach us how to see the world in that sense. They are without artifice; they see it for what it is. I am drawn to that ruthless honesty." But, didn't we all start out as children? Then what happened that allowed dishonesty to overcome the child's propensity toward honesty?

 One plausible response might be that the children have all too well learned the ways of many adults in their life's sphere. If the reader accepts this as an acceptable possibility, then as adults we are obligated to prepare children to become honest individuals. Jose Marti suggests, "A child, from the time he can think, should think about all he sees, should suffer for all who cannot live with honesty, should work so that all men can be honest, and should be honest himself." For those of us who advocate for children this suggestion makes good sense. After all, as John Ruskin penned, "To make your children capable of honesty is the beginning of education." Plutarch was aware of the close connection between a child's formal and informal learning, and the inculcating of the value of honesty into an individual's life. He was quoted as saying, "The very spring and root of honesty and virtue lie in good education." Centuries later Thomas Jefferson would write, "Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom."
 

Unfortunately, we come to believe that we must somehow encapsulate a value such as honesty into some form of tangible capital. The old American sage Benjamin Franklin is given credit for the saying "Honesty is the best policy." Robert E. Lee blanched at Franklin's statement stating, “The trite saying that honesty is the best policy has met with the just criticism that honesty is not policy. The real honest man is honest from conviction of what is right, not from policy.” Honesty, much the same as any other value or moral, is difficult to legislate or to adjudicate. The fundamental responsibility lies much deeper than what setting of superficial parameters can respond to adequately. Applying Lee's line of thought to our obligation to our children, George Bernard Shaw wrote, “We must make the world honest before we can honestly say to our children that honesty is the best policy.”
 

Therein lies a major challenge to the adult members of our society; making the world honest. The challenge is finding the redeeming value in, and of, honesty. A society fixated on tangible values often finds difficulty in understanding and accepting the inherent value of what it considers intangible. Josh Billings suggests. "Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain't lawful tender for a loaf of bread." For honesty to claim its true and ultimate value, we have to see it as something far greater than coinage. William Shakespeare may have been writing to this very line of reasoning when he wrote, “No legacy is so rich as honesty.” After all, even for those whose religion has as its missal an accountant's balance ledger, and its hymnal the stock market report, leaving a legacy is important. And as Kate Hudson reminds us, "Honesty will never break you."

 

"Almost any difficulty will move in the face of honesty.

When I am honest I never feel stupid.

And when I am honest I am automatically humble."

--Hugh Prather

"Irony is just honesty with the volume cranked up."

--George Saunders

Core Value - Truth

"Truth is powerful and it prevails."

--Sojourner Truth

"Truth is our element"

--Ralph Waldo Emerson

Chris Thurman, in his book The 12 Best Kept Secrets for Living an Emotionally Health Life writes, "Whether you realize it or not, truth is the most important issue in your life. It is more important than what you do for a living, who you are married to, or what you earn. I am convinced that truth is the bottom line of life. You cannot have "real life" without truth." Like the core value of trust, truth is believed by the writer to be considered inviolate. No, it is not the intention of this entry to come across as sanctimonious dribble, but it is believed that where an individual stands in regards to his/her beliefs about truth, and how it plays out in his/her own life speaks volumes about how that person perceives such human qualities as trust, character, respect, and dignity.

Ayn Rand noted, “The truth is not for all [men], but only for those who seek it.” In a like manner, Albert Einstein observed, “The search for truth is more precious than its possession.” Katherine Mansfield believed the risk in dealing with the truth matters enough that she said, “Risk! Risk anything! Care no more for the opinions of others, for those voices. Do the hardest thing on earth for you. Act for yourself. Face the truth.” Taking a more global perspective on the subject of truth and the risks associated with it, William Sloane Coffin stated, "The world is too dangerous for anything but truth and too small for anything but love."

Edmund Burke believed he knew where to find truth, but also believed finding it came with certain conditions. Burke wrote, "Truth resides in every human heart, and one has to search for it there, and to be guided by truth as one sees it. But no one has a right to coerce others to act according to his own view of truth." The problem with Burke's perspective, at least to some, is the suggestion of multiple truths, rather than a single "truth." Aside from the parochial Christian belief that Jesus Christ is the ultimate "Truth," the concept that there may be more that one truth is likely to create dissonance it the minds of the seekers. Perhaps this was partially what Oscar Wilde had in mind when he observed, “The truth is rarely pure and never simple.” In addition, Linda Ellinor was reported as saying, “What you perceive, your observations, feelings, interpretations, are all your truth. Your truth is important. Yet it is not The Truth.”

Perhaps one of the more difficult realizations for those who seek "truth" is the very fact that is has to be sought in the first place. Rational thought would have us believe, if truth is so concrete, then why is it not just downright obvious? The person seeking truth might first try to understand the obstacles that may await them along the way. Long ago, Tertullian, voiced the opinion that, “The first reaction to truth is hatred.” It is understandable that upon hearing such a perspective, a person might be hesitant to begin the search, or terminate it if already underway. But, as C.S. Lewis wrote regarding the seeking of truth, “If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair.”

As Lewis notes, the pursuit of truth may pay off in the long run, but each individual has to weigh whether, or not, it is worth the risk. Dorothy Thompson speaking to such risk, suggested, "There is nothing to fear except the persistent refusal to find out the truth, the persistent refusal to analyze the causes of happenings." There was no doubt in Clarence Darrow's mind about pursuit of truth when he stated, "Chase after the truth like all hell and you'll free yourself, even though you never touch its coattails." Addressed a tad less flamboyantly than by Darrow, Max Planck related, "It is not the possession of truth, but the success which attends the seeking after it, that enriches the seeker and brings happiness to him. The British statesman Winston Churchill added his thoughts on the subject, “The truth is incontrovertible, malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end; there it is.”

Just as with trust, the examination of the core value "truth" must begin at the individual level, looking within, before venturing without. Seeking truth, especially one's own awareness of truth, requires that stalwart ingredient associated previously with trust; courage. Acknowledging the risk involved in seeking one's truth, and/or the universal truth, one must call upon their fortitude to venture forward. Maya Angelou is aware of the importance of courage in seeking the truth, and writes, "One isn't necessarily born with courage, but one is born with potential. Without courage, we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can't be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest." Along this line of thought Virginia Wolf made the observation, "If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people."

A typical response to this suggestion might be "ouch!" Meaningful personal development and growth seldom come without an associated cost factor, but as an unknown author shared, “Unless your heart, your soul, and your whole being are behind every decision you make, the words from your mouth will be empty." In a similar fashion, Apple Computer's Steve Jobs said, “Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary, and each action will be meaningless. Truth and confidence are the roots of happiness.”

Earlier, Albert Einstein  was much of the same mind as Jobs confiding, "The ideals which have lighted me on my way and time after time given me new courage to face life cheerfully, have been Truth, Goodness, and Beauty. . . . The ordinary objects of human endeavor -- property, outward success, luxury -- have always seemed to me contemptible." Still, even earlier, the Buddha shared with his followers, "Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held. Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin. Believe nothing just because someone else believes it. Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true." Regardless of how one words it, the journey towards truth must first turn inward, before advancing into what lies outward. The hope is that the person finds the truth that lies within in order to begin sharing with, and helping, others to discover their own truth.

The Children's Champion believes truth and truthfulness are as important, if not more important, in our dealings with children, as in any other life endeavor. Advocates for children cannot believe anything other than the innocence of children upon being born. Just as with trust, children learn to deal with matters of truth by the living examples around them, primarily parents and other close family members. As the caretakers of young minds, we must be ever vigilante of the example we set for them. Otherwise, we become but caricatures in a play based on folly at best; vice at worse. Albert Einstein observed, “Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters cannot be trusted with important matters.” Although the moral and ethical rearing of children is no "small matter," Einstein's point is still very relevant to the current discussion. If we are careless with truth in our dealings with children, how on earth can we be trusted to be truthful in any other aspect of life?

Being "truthful" with, and around, children is not all that is required of us. Mahatma Gandhi believed, "Whenever you have truth it must be given with love, or the message and the messenger will be rejected.” Thoreau, in a similar fashion wrote, "The only way to tell the truth is to speak with kindness. Only the words of a loving man can be heard.” The civil rights leader Martin Luther King, Jr., although speaking to a much broader audience, was still on the same wavelength when he said, "I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. This is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant." In simple language, it is more than just the message. It is the spirit and manner in which it is given. If we lack sincerity and honorable intention, then our words and actions will be but a shadowy, shallow, betrayal of truth, whether we recognize and accept it as such, or not.

The writer recognizes that some readers will consider the association of love and kindness with truth as soppy sentimentalism. The choice of how one wishes to respond to anything offered herein is always the reader’s option; however, the Children’s Champion chooses to go with the thoughts of Benjamin Disraeli, “Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so, you apologize for the truth.”

The wise individual will consider both the effect and affect of his or her decisions and actions. Why should it be any different when addressing the issue of truth? As Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote, “Truth, and goodness, and beauty are but different faces of the same all.” Except for the most diehard stoic, the truth can be a very emotionally difficult matter at times. Children, unless artificially hardened - and many of them are, unfortunately - understand that telling the truth can be an emotionally painful experience. You don’t believe that statement? Then why do children, and many adults, come to believe that it is easier to lie at times than to tell the truth? As adults, we must be willing to recognize that being truthful can, and often does, make one vulnerable. Edward R. Murrow once observed, “Most truths are so naked that people feel sorry for them and cover them up, at least a little bit.” How many of us dread standing in front of the bathroom mirror naked because of the image that is reflected back at us. If we can’t handle that “truth,” then how can we expect to honorably and responsibly address other matters of truth?

When we can recognize the universal transforming power of truth, and infuse the power of truth into our dealings with each other, especially children, we not only become exceptional role models, we hold within our hands the power to truly transform our world; our own truth. As George Orwell wrote, “In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.” Imagine that, we can become a revolutionary by consciously transcending falsehood, and telling and living the truth, even if it is our own truth. Emily Dickinson recognized, “Truth is such a rare thing, it is delighted to tell it.” Or in the words of Pearl S. Buck, “The truth is always exciting. Speak it, then. Life is dull without it.”

"Truth is not only violated by falsehood;

it may be equally outraged by silence."

-- Henri-Frederic Amiel

"The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie

 -- deliberate, contrived and dishonest --

but the myth -- persistent,

persuasive and unrealistic."

-- John F. Kennedy

"The beginning of wisdom is found in doubting;

by doubting we come to the question,

and by seeking we may come upon the truth."

--Pierre Abelard

Core Value - Trust

“Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have

perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves.

We must believe that we are gifted for something,

and that this thing, at whatever cost,

must be attained.”

--Marie Curry

Do you know your core values? Sincerely! Have you taken the time to deeply reflect on those values that not only add meaning to your life, but define your life's meaning; purpose? The next several entries will cover several core values of great importance to the writer. The first, to be the focus of this entry, is trust.

Trust is believed to be the sine qua non of values, without which the rest become both of little importance, and unlikely to exist in trust's absence. Anton Chekhov notes, “You must trust and believe in people or life becomes impossible.” Trust is not all that important to getting along in life, you say? Well, the lock manufactures and alarm system companies are doing a great business because of the lack of trust! Trust is so important to the Children's Champion he considers it almost sacramental; sacrosanct. Robbing him of all his earthy possessions would likely cause him far less pain than violating his trust. Each of us has to determine the importance we put on anything and everything that impacts our lives, and trust might not be that high a priority on some people's list. It is on mine! In the words of an unknown author, “Without trust, words become the hollow sound of a wooden gong. With trust, words become life itself.”

Those of us who put such great emphasis on trust believe that it is fundamental to the decisions we make, and actions we take, in our daily lives. Especially when it comes to human interactions and relationships, trust constitutes the main ingredient in such recipes. However, before the reader begins feeling that this expose on trust is awash with Pollyannaish naiveté, here comes one of the caveats that can leave trust hanging over the precipice of regret; vulnerability. There is no denying entering into any type of trust relationship can leave one exposed to the arrows of betrayal, ridicule, embarrassment, and pain. Walter Anderson states, “We're never so vulnerable than when we trust someone - but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy.” Or, as the old Irish saying goes, “When mistrust comes in, love goes out.” Yet another thought on the subject is expressed by an unknown author who states, “Trust is like a vase… once it's broken, though you can fix it the vase will never be same again.”

On a somewhat metaphysical level, T. S. Eliot wrote, “No soul is desolate as long as there is a human being for whom it can feel trust and reverence.” No doubt about it, trust can be pretty "heavy stuff" in a person's life, and can certainly lead one to end up in numberless dead-ends, and constantly taking detours along the path of life.

Although one might mistakenly set to thinking that trust is required of us, or represents a quid pro quo phenomenon, the reality is that trust is a gift. In this regard, Friedrich Nietzsche wrote, “People who have given us their complete confidence believe that they have a right to ours. The inference is false, a gift confers no rights.” But lest one gets too sanctimonious, Nietzsche also noted, “I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you” Lie betrays trust. Trust spurned, or abused, is akin to someone being given ownership of the Grand Canyon and then deciding to turn it into a landfill because he believes he has no responsibility to acknowledge the value of the gift, its inherent worth and beauty, regardless of its value to the previous owner.

Corporations, executive, judicial, and legislative branches of governments, schools, religious institutions, organizations, groups, and individuals frequently ply the slogan "Trust Me." However, there are way too many instances of betrayal in everyone's life to not be at least a bit skeptical and cynical when those words are addressed to them by someone; stranger or intimate. The following story comes to mind that seems appropriate at this point in the presentation:

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The Scorpion and the Frog

One day, a scorpion looked around at the mountain where he lived and decided that he wanted a change. So he set out on a journey through the forests and hills. He climbed over rocks and under vines and kept going until he reached a river.

The river was wide and swift, and the scorpion stopped to reconsider the situation. He couldn't see any way across. So he ran upriver and then checked downriver, all the while thinking that he might have to turn back.

Suddenly, he saw a frog sitting in the rushes by the bank of the stream on the other side of the river. He decided to ask the frog for help getting across the stream.

"Hellooo, Mr. Frog!" called the scorpion across the water, "Would you be so kind as to give me a ride on your back across the river?"

"Well now, Mr. Scorpion! How do I know that if I try to help you, you won’t try to kill me?" asked the frog hesitantly.

"Because," the scorpion replied, "If I try to kill you, then I would die too, for you see I cannot swim!"

Now this seemed to make sense to the frog. But he asked. "What about when I get close to the bank? You could still try to kill me and get back to the shore!"

"This is true," agreed the scorpion, "But then I wouldn't be able to get to the other side of the river!"

"Alright then...how do I know you won’t just wait till we get to the other side and THEN kill me?" said the frog.

"Ahh...," crooned the scorpion, "Because you see, once you've taken me to the other side of this river, I will be so grateful for your help, that it would hardly be fair to reward you with death, now would it?!"

So the frog agreed to take the scorpion across the river. He swam over to the bank and settled himself near the mud to pick up his passenger. The scorpion crawled onto the frog's back, his sharp claws prickling into the frog's soft hide, and the frog slid into the river. The muddy water swirled around them, but the frog stayed near the surface so the scorpion would not drown. He kicked strongly through the first half of the stream, his flippers paddling wildly against the current.

Halfway across the river, the frog suddenly felt a sharp sting in his back and, out of the corner of his eye, saw the scorpion remove his stinger from the frog's back. A deadening numbness began to creep into his limbs.

"You fool!" croaked the frog, "Now we shall both die! Why on earth did you do that?"

The scorpion shrugged, and did a little jig on the drowning frog's back.

"I could not help myself. It is my nature."

Then they both sank into the muddy waters of the swiftly flowing river.

Self destruction - "Its my Nature", said the Scorpion...

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Trust, and trust building, begins with the individual. The person desiring trust from others must first explore that region of the psyche personally. Granted, learning to trust oneself can have most of the same pitfalls as trusting another, but only the individual can determine if the risk of self-examination, and self-trust, is worth the effort, risks, and paybacks. Golda Meir stated, “Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement.” In a similar fashion, Sarah McLachlan shared, “I've learned to trust myself, to listen to truth, to not be afraid of it and to not try and hide it.” The reader is asked to take note of the connection Sarah made between trust and truth. Truth will be the topic of the next entry, but it is believed important that we note the relationship of the two values as this juncture in order to add continuity between the two values and the entries regarding them.

Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote, “Self-trust is the first secret of success.” We will leave it up to the reader to define success and the importance of success in their individual lives. Our point here is that if you cannot trust yourself, you can hardly be expected to trust others, and in the absence of trust, success, regardless of its definition, is unlikely to be experienced. Emerson went on to write about the opposition and discouragement the individual might experience as s/he works at building his/her self-trust. He noted, “Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires courage.”

Courage is another value, or quality, to be reflected upon at a later date, but the reader is asked to consider the statement above regarding trust making one vulnerable. Realizing the potential for vulnerability, the person entering into a trust relationship will be called upon to muster some amount of courage. Without the courage to risk becoming vulnerable, it is unlikely that a trust relationship can emerge. The interconnectedness between these fundamental values is nearly as essential as the auricle is the ventricle of the human heart.

So, where do children, and advocating for children, fit into the current conversation. Dead center! Children need to be able to trust the adults in their lives. We see this trust constantly being violated in the form of neglect and abuse, in all of their ugly disguises, in the breaking of promises, in the disregarding of confidentiality between adult and child, in the form of lies, and in all the forms of betrayal that bruise and erode the adult-child trust relationship. It is hard to say with certainty when the trusting of the adult begins with children, likely at the mother's breast, if not before, but we know with a fair degree of certainty, the child is susceptible to having that trust relationship damaged equally early. Trust cannot be quantified, but observation can give witness to its diminishing.

Who do you trust? Is it a gift? Who trusts you? Do you receive it as a gift? What does it add to your life? Is it worth being one of your core values? Any scorpions in your life?

“The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.”

--Ernest Hemingway

Education

Theories and goals of education don't matter a whit
if you don't consider your students
to be human beings.
--Lou Ann Walker

Some may find the words of Lou Ann Walker "don't matter a whit" in a meaningful exchange regarding education. In fact, there are undoubtedly people, particularly among the ranks of "educators," who find Walker's words professionally, and personally, insulting. In the final equation, regardless of the individual's reaction to what Walker is suggesting, she undoubtedly drives a stake into the heart of those institutions, groups, and individuals who choose to refer to children as "resources," "assets," or any other nominal term of depersonalization that scrapes away the child's skin of humanity, and replaces it with chainmail woven of integers, symbols, and assorted nondescript labels. John Dewey believed, "Education is not preparation for life; education is life itself." If Dewey is correct in his assessment, then there is no choice but to first, and foremost, accept the child in all of his or her humanness before one enters into a conversation about education and learning. To do otherwise would not only dishonor the child, but dishonor the adult as well.

Equally important to the acknowledgment of the human qualities of the student is the development of a conceptual understanding of "education" in order to determine its purpose; its raison d'être. Paulo Freire believes, "Education either functions as an instrument which is used to facilitate integration of the younger generation into the logic of the present system and bring about conformity or it becomes the practice of freedom, the means by which men and women deal critically and creatively with reality and discover how to participate in the transformation of their world." Freire's "freedom" is manifested through the person's faculty of thought. As Bill Beattie suggests, "The aim of education should be to teach us rather how to think, than what to think - rather to improve our minds, so as to enable us to think for ourselves, than to load the memory with thoughts of other men." Or, as Oliver Wendell Holmes expresses it, "The main part of intellectual education is not the acquisition of facts but learning how to make facts live." Thoughts are equally important in Edith Hamilton's definition of education. In her words, "To be able to be caught up into the world of thought -- that is educated." The ability to think is directly linked to the tendency of the individual to question; to question anything and everything. William Allin believes this is where education comes into its own right, suggesting, "Education is not the answer to the question. Education is the means to the answer to all questions."

In The Ascent of Man, J. Bronowski addresses the importance of helping, and more importantly, allowing, students to become thinkers, and questioners of their human existence. According to Bronowski, "It is important that students bring a certain ragamuffin, barefoot, irreverence to their studies; they are not here to worship what is known, but to question it." There is little reason to doubt that insistence on teaching students to think might be unnerving to some individuals and social institutions. It would seem almost sacrilegious to believe that a society and its governing structures would find reason not to invest heavily in the education of its citizens. However, from the perspective of Henry Peter Broughan, "Education makes people easy to lead, but difficult to drive; easy to govern, but impossible to enslave." In the words of Aristotle, "All who have meditated on the art of governing mankind have been convinced that the fate of empires depends on the education of youth." One of the United States' founding fathers, John Adams, insisted, "Laws for the liberal education of youth, especially for the lower classes of people, are so extremely wise and useful that to a humane and generous mind, no expense for this purpose would be thought extravagant. And, George Peabody notes, "Education: a debt due from present to future generations."

Education is certainly no enemy to honest government ,and an honorable society. Such a government and society does not fear education, but embraces and supports it to the fullest. As Nelson Mandela acknowledged, "Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world." Especially, if that change we seek is peace, then education, not politics and the arsenals of war, should be the weapons of choice. Maria Montessori believed, "Establishing lasting peace is the work of education; all politics can do is keep us out of war." Education is essential to removing the obstacles to a universal and lasting peace.

Prejudice is one of the major obstacles education must be aimed at removing. Charlotte Bronte states, "Prejudices, it is well known, are most difficult to eradicate from the heart whose soil has never been loosened or fertilized by education; they grow there, firm as weeds among rocks." Peace is also more likely to come about when, as citizens of one planet, we recognize that being of service, rather than being at odds, to one another is a step in the right direction. Addressing this line of thought, Marian Wright Edelman stated, "Education is for improving the lives of others and for leaving your community and world better than you found it."

Although education and learning is frequently measured by its utility and tangible value, there is also intrinsic and intangible value as well. Edith Hamilton would argue, "It has always seemed strange to me that in our endless discussions about education so little stress is laid on the pleasure of becoming an educated person, the enormous interest it adds to life. To be able to be caught up into the world of thought -- that is to be educated. For Helen Keller, education had existential meaning. In her words, "Have you ever been at sea in a dense fog, when it seemed as if a tangible white darkness shut you in and the great ship, tense and anxious, groped her way toward the shore with plummet and sounding-line, and you waited with beating heart for something to happen? I was like that ship before my education began, only I was without compass or sounding line, and no way of knowing how near the harbor was. "Light! Give me light!" was the wordless cry of my soul, and the light of love shone on me in that very hour."

Intrinsic and intangible qualities cannot, must not, be overlooked, or devalued, in the planning and development of educational institutions and environments for all learners, especially children. We must also guard against substituting "indoctrination" for "education," both in our lexicon and in our and operations manual. The first restricts, constricts, and pushes the individual in a predetermined manner. The latter broadens, loosens, and frees the individual to determine his or her own future. The first controls, the latter encourages. In the words of William Butler Yeats, "Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire."

Education and learning should not be such a difficult task. We merely need to tap into the natural curiosity of children and add meaning to our efforts. In the words of Simone Weil, "The joy of learning is as indispensable in study as breathing is in running. Where it is lacking there are no real students, but only poor caricatures of apprentices who, at the end of their apprenticeship, will not even have a trade." Why should learning not be fun? Why is it that we still hear such worn and pitiful clichés as, "school is not meant to be fun. The children are there to learn, not to have a good time?" Do we really believe that? Can we allow ourselves to believe that? All each of us has to do is to look at our own lives; our own learning experiences. Which meant the most to you? Those performed under duress, or those gladly entered into?

For education and learning to be a joy, fun, and rewarding, it is believed important that we expend prodigious amounts of energy, effort, time, and financial resources to make learning exciting. Anyone that has spent much time around children knows how quickly they can become bored with what they are engaged in at any given moment. For those that subscribe to "learning shouldn't be fun," the fact that children are bored with the intended learning activity may not be of any consequence. On the flip side, the rest of us realize that boredom quickly kills enthusiasm, and as enthusiasm dissipates, so does learning.

Speaking to the issue of boredom and its impact on learning opportunities, Fritz Redl, in When We Deal With Children notes, "Boredom will always remain the greatest enemy of school disciplines. If we remember that children are bored, not only when they don't happen to be interested in the subject or when the teacher doesn't make it interesting, but also when certain working conditions are out of focus with their basic needs, then we can realize what a great contributor to discipline problems boredom really is. Research has shown that boredom is closely related to frustration and that the effect of too much frustration is invariably irritability, withdrawal, rebellious opposition or aggressive rejection of the whole show." If we can accept the point Fritz Redl is making in this statement, then we can find the utility in eliminating boredom from the learning environment, as well as the intrinsic value. With discipline issues frequently being a hot topic in school-related conversations, here we see an opportunity to increase effective learning, while reducing the disruptive student behaviors. Does this perspective not hold out the possibility of the proverbial "win-win" solution so many organizations and individuals seek in their daily operations and exchanges?

Before ending this reflection on education and learning, it seems appropriate to remind ourselves of how important the adult's role is in the "total education" of the child. Contemplating the role of the adult in children's education, one would be well served by embracing the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson: "“Who you are speaks so loudly I can't hear what you're saying.” Or, in the words of James Baldwin, "Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them." The duty and responsibility of the current adult generation to provide for the education of the younger generation is not to be taken lightly. There is no denying that educating our youth is quite an obligation, but it need not be considered burdensome, instead, a privilege. Rachel Carson, in her book A Sense of Wonder, reminds us, "If a child is to keep alive his inborn sense of wonder, he needs the companionship of at least one adult who can share it, rediscovering with him the joy, excitement and mystery of the world we live in."

Objectives

"You are a product of your environment.

So choose the environment that will best

develop you toward your objective.

 Analyze your life in terms of its environment.

Are the things around you helping you toward success

- or are they holding you back?"

--W. Clement Stone

The wisdom of W. Clement Stone is worthy of consideration in the development of objectives regardless if it is for the individual, or collective group. As the fourth foundational part of putting together an effective life plan, or organizational strategic plan, determining and applying appropriate objectives is rudimentary to ensuring the likelihood of successful outcomes. In the words of John McDonald, "A set definite objective must be established if we are to accomplish anything in a big way." There is no drought of research regarding human propensity to fail to plan, living what Thoreau termed "lives of quiet desperation;" a road-less area with no map available.

George Halas suggests, "Many people flounder about in life because they do not have a purpose, an objective toward which to work." Unfortunately, this malaise begins early in life. Those of us who work with young children notice acedia establishing a firm foothold in even the very young. A sense of purpose, anticipation, and hopefulness gives way to apathy, torpor, and overall hopelessness. We adults must be willing to take bold steps to rudely interrupt this downward spiral of the young human spirit, help children to take a new compass reading and chart a new pathway to the future, one built upon worthwhile objectives. Just as one's goals should be such that they require the person to reach and extend themselves, so too should the goals' underlying objectives have the same effect. In the words of Abbott L. Lowell, "You will seek not a near but a distant objective, and you will not be satisfied with what you may have done." Only when we adjust our compass setting to the "true north" of the human destiny will we be able to rise above mediocrity and the poverty of will, and find our true purpose in life; what gives our life meaning.

We must instill within ourselves, and our children, the courage, curiosity, and strength to reach out, to seek new adventures and unexplore the unknown, to be willing to risk failure rather than settle for the "scraps of life." George Wald puts this perspective into action, noting, "I tell my students to try early in life to find an unattainable objective." If we hope to improve our world, to realize a better future for ourselves and our children, then risk we must! As the character Jack Beauregard in the movie "My Name is Nobody" says, "If the risk is little, the reward is little." More than a line in a movie, this is a maxim that one would imagine Emmanuel Kant might give the nod of approval to as being universal in its applicability to the human drama.

The formal institutions of learning in the United States, and other countries of the world, undoubtedly have a monumental task placed upon their backs and shoulders by the society being served. Often the obligation of preparing a new generation for their place in the world as adults is analogous to a straight jacket, a hair shirt, or a yoke with a heavy ball and chain at either end. Decisions are usually challenging, and frequently challenged. That is why it is imperative that clear and defendable plans of operation must be developed, implemented, and honored by all stakeholders impacted by a particular school, or school system. One of the first steps in the process is to have the courage to look honestly at what currently exists. In what might appear at first somewhat a play on words, Michael Bloomberg states, "Well, we have to provide the world's best schools. We certainly don't have them, but that's our objective." Arthur Helps believes, "In a balanced organization, working towards a common objective, there is success." Between Bloomberg and Helps we have an alliance between verb and noun, "objective" as an action and a destination. The alchemy of these two creates the foundational building blocks to effective organizational planning, in this case schools.

The irony of establishing objectives comes about in our being "objective" in their development. News reporter Peter Jennings observed, "I'm a little concerned about this notion everybody wants us to be objective." Kyra Sedgwick contends that the process of being objective and creating operational objectives is complicated when more than one person in involved in the process. She says, "But when you're in something together, it's very hard to be objective and you're very subjective." If the process is not challenged enough by the involvement of multiple players, how much more challenged is the process when it is at an organizational level. Breyten Breytenbach shares his thoughts about the complexities of organizations that enter into the process of finding a common "objective." He relates, "In reality the workings of your governing system are opaque and covert, while hiding in the chattering spotlight of an ostensible transparency, even though the ultimate objective is clear." Even though Breytenbach's observations may be applied to any organization, it is believed to be very applicable to the governing structures of school systems, which are frequently governed by individuals with great intentions, but poor understanding of the vagarities inherent to the functioning of schools as organizations, and usually ill-equipped to steer the organization through the labyrinth of decision-making challenges.

Especially at the organizational level, one realizes that communication, in all its forms, and with all its nuances, is vital to successful planning and operation. Perhaps that is why every organization might make its initial step, improving communication. Mike Davidson, speaking from a personal perspective, offers, "I don't start with a design objective, I start with a communication objective. I feel my project is successful if it communicates what it is supposed to communicate." In support of Davidson's view, Andre Gide adds, "A straight path never leads anywhere except to the objective." The fewer detours one takes in reaching the stated objective, the greater the likelihood that the intended outcome of the objective will be realized. In a similar fashion, if we are to honor the planning process, once the objective has been attempted, successful or not, stagnation or regression must not be permitted. George C. Marshall advises, "When a thing is done, it's done. Don't look back. Look forward to your next objective."

 

Objectives are structures we create to support our efforts to accomplish a determined goal, which are structures developed to support our mission, which is a structure designed to support our efforts to fulfill our vision, or purpose. A building contractor recently related a process that Japanese builders have developed whereby the roof is built first at ground level, and then raised by a series of jacks and lifts to the height it will be once the foundation and walls are built to support the roof. In a similar fashion we develop a mental picture (blueprints and architect's perspectives) of our vision (the house), determine how we will proceed (roof first) to accomplish our mission (building the house), and then put into place those supports (objectives for the foundation, goals for the walls) that will allow our vision to become reality. This process, as is the whole strategic and life planning process, is somewhat counter-intuitive to the rational, linear, mind that tells us that the best way to build a house, or achieving a vision, is to put the foundation into place first, then the walls, and then the roof. Yet we know that the vision, the idea, the mental image, must come first before action is taken, otherwise the action becomes pointless. Also, much like the Japanese builders, by constructing the part of the project that is most subject to accident and failure at ground level, not only is risk reduced, but perspective is developed, providing the builders a clearer picture of exactly what it is that they are working toward supporting, and how all the parts fit together to complete the desired outcome. Seems like a fitting analogy for our current topic. Hopefully, you will agree.

"We all live with the objective of being happy;

our lives are all different and yet the same.

--Anne Frank