Integrity

"Integrity is never painless. It requires that we let

matters rub up against each other,that we fully experience

the tension of conflicting needs,demands, and interests,

that we even be emotionally torn apart by them ...

It does not seek to avoid conflict, but to reconcile it."

~M. Scott Peck, The Different Drum

"Integrity means being whole, unbroken, undivided.

It describes a person who has united the different

parts of his or her personality, so there is no longer

a split in the soul ... For the person of integrity,

life may not be easy but it is simple:

Figure out what is right and do it.

All other considerations come in second."

~Harold Kushner, Living a Life That Matters

When you hear the word “integrity,” especially when applied to a particular individual, organization, or experience, what comes to mind? Do you use the term, and acknowledge the concept deliberately and with reverence, or do you use it carelessly and toss it around as frivolously as you would a used up toothpaste tube? It is my sincere hope that your response is the first rather than the latter. You might ask, “Why all the formality regarding one’s orientation to a commonly used term and generally understood idea?” The answer for this writer is rather fundamental in that he believes that integrity is the crescendo of the meshing together of all other core values, both the ones we have covered so far, and those yet to be explored in future entries. In the words of Peter Ragnar, "Values are what construct integrity, and values are what one must fight to gain, keep, and protect." Integrity acts as the sinew that binds all the other elements together - our core values and beliefs that add quality and substance to our lives – that gives our lives meaning.

The late Buckminster Fuller put the importance of integrity in these words: "Integrity is the essence of everything successful." For those of you who are at least vaguely familiar with the biography of Buckminster Fuller, you realize the power of that statement. Just as his famous “geodesic dome” design of buildings provided great strength and integrity to the structures utilizing the physics and engineering of that design, one can believe that Mr. Fuller’s approbation regarding “integrity” was no shallow gesticulation on his part.

"The creative is the place where no one else has ever been.

You have to leave the city of your comfort and go

into the wilderness of your intuition.

What you'll discover will be wonderful.

What you'll discover is yourself."

~ Alan Alda

As noted earlier, Peter Ragnar, much like Fuller, places a very high value upon integrity. As Ragnar states, “Integrity - a value so rare and hard to find. It is like a diamond in a sea of glass, which only a trained eye can detect.” To this suggestion he adds, “You cannot have a quality you're yet to identify. And once you know what it is, it does not immediately come into your possession.” After decades of searching for a meaning of integrity that he could live with, Ragnar concluded, “"Integrity is the adherence to a code of values. That's why so few ever find it within themselves." Furthermore, and why we have chosen to speak of the importance of integrity at this point in our expose on core values, Ragnar poses a query with a corresponding response: “What actually do you value, and why? If you do not have a clearly established hierarchy of the values you live your life by, values you'll never compromise, then you've yet to find integrity. Integrity is a ladder; its rungs are values. It is on this that you must climb to reach your dreams….Values are a necessity of both psychological and physical survival. They control your subconscious desires and conscious choices. They form the blueprint for your life that guides every desire and decision. It's in these values and the code you follow that forms the whole course your life will follow. The adherence to that code is your integrity. This integrity is the basis for your happiness.”

To some, speaking to the transcendent qualities of integrity may seem trite and greatly over-played for dramatic effect. As always, the reader of these entries is invited to respectfully disagree with any of the contents presented. However, it is this writer’s opinion that the person who wishes to ascend to the more rarified air of “presence,” rather than continue descending into the suffocating miasma of “existence,” striving to live a life of integrity is not an option, but a requirement. As alpinists will forewarn those aspiring to challenge the mountain, reaching the summit is fraught with seemingly endless challenges and pitfalls, the greatest of those lying within the individual rather upon the face of the mountain being scaled. So too, the individual accepting the challenge of charting a clear pathway to the summit of their life, a life of integrity, must be constantly alert to those hazards that impede their progress. Core values, much like the climber’s pitons, anchor us to something solid, something we can attach our life-line to, something that will catch us and prevent major harm and/or setback should we slip and fall. Without core values there is no integrity. Without integrity our lives are a perpetual free-fall, a life of questionable, if any, meaningful purpose.

As with the climber of mountains, the individual contemplating scaling the heights of integrity comes to understand that before the actual journey begins there is much to be done to prepare mentally and spiritually for the task ahead. Joe Tye, America’s Values Coach, frames such preparation this way: "Integrity begins with introspection; you must learn to trust and respect yourself before you can expect that others will trust and respect you." Easy, you say? Remember, we are not talking in the mode of flim-flam, flap, and froth. We are addressing life’s vicissitudes from a very raw, vulnerable, and soul-scouring mode. As Harper Lee wrote in To Kill a Mockingbird, “Before I can live with other folks I've got to live with myself. The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.”

We must have the courage to address Georges Courteline’s charge as expressed in La philosophie de Georges Courteline: “If it was necessary to tolerate in other people everything that one permits oneself, life would be unbearable.” We must also have great courage, including the courage to recognize that our journey upwards will require us to address many complex questions, leaving some of them unanswered and abandoned along the way; unnecessary baggage not anchors. Michael Moore adds to Courteline’s thoughts on courage noting, “The highest courage is to dare to be yourself in the face of adversity. Choosing right over wrong, ethic over convenience, and truth over popularity ... these are choices that measure your life. Travel the path of integrity without looking back, for there is never a wrong time to do the right thing.” Writing in Arctic Dreams, Barry Lopez observes, “How is one to live a moral and compassionate existence when one finds darkness not only in one's culture but within oneself? There are simply no answers to some of the great pressing questions. You continue to live them out, making your life a worthy expression of leaning into the light.” The importance of courage to living a life of integrity cannot be lightly dismissed. Keshavan Nair comes right to the point stating, “With courage you will dare to take risks, have the strength to be compassionate, and the wisdom to be humble. Courage is the foundation of integrity.” It is hard to get much more fundamental than that.

"You have enemies?

Good!

That means you've stood up for something,

sometime in your life."

- Winston Churchill

By its very nature, integrity creates a conundrum for those seeking it. Integrity is something one fully commits to, or not at all. In the words of Peter Scotese, “Integrity is not a 90 percent thing, not a 95 percent thing; either you have it or you don't.” John D. MacDonald agrees. He believes, “Integrity is not a conditional word. It doesn't blow in the wind or change with the weather. It is your inner image of yourself, and if you look in there and see a man who won't cheat, then you know he never will.” Also, a commitment to integrity leaves no escape route. According to Don Galer, “Integrity is what we do, what we say, and what we say we do.”

Really, we are talking serious personal commitment when are addressing the master value of integrity. Henry Kravis reduces what we are considering to its basics when he states, “If you don’t have integrity, you have nothing. You can’t buy it. You can have all the money in the world, but if you are not a moral and ethical person, you really have nothing.” Kenneth Lay is of a similar mind when he relates, “I threw my whole life and lived my life in a certain way to make sure that I would never violate any law…certainly never any criminal laws…and always maintained that most important to me was my integrity, was my character, were my values.”

“One of the truest tests of integrity

is its blunt refusal to be compromised.”

~Chinua Achebe

In a world that seems to endorse a philosophy of “anything goes,” how do we convince ourselves or others that integrity is worth the effort. It boils down to a matter of choice; of free will. Pablo Casals expressed it this way: “Every wrong seems possible today, and is accepted. I don’t accept it.” British author Samuel Johnson, back in the 18th century wrote, “A person is not given integrity. It results from the relentless pursuit of honesty at all times.” Things get even more complicated if the person aspiring to live a life of, and with, integrity is searching for some type of manual or guide book to guide them. Albert Camus suggests, “Integrity has no need of rules.”

Unfortunately, Camus leaves most of us gasping for air with his “no need of rules” perspective. Most of us need something a little more substantial to assist us in getting our bearings. Bill McCartney strives toward parsimony in helping us to understand the concept of integrity, stating, "If you want to take the meaning of the word integrity and reduce it to its simplest terms, you'd conclude that a man of integrity is a promise keeper. When he gives you his word you can take it to the bank. His word is good." Barbara De Angelis is somewhat less parsimonious than McCartney when she attempts to define integrity, but still manages to winnow away the chaff. De Angelis suggests, “Living with integrity means:
• Not settling for less than what you know you deserve in your relationships.
• Asking for what you want and need from others.
• Speaking your truth, even though it might create conflict or tension.
• Behaving in ways that are in harmony with your personal values.
• Making choices based on what you believe, and not what others believe.”

"Live so that your friends can defend you but never have to."

~Arnold H. Glasow

Much like Little Gidding, we end up back where we began bringing us back to the question of “Why should we seek to live a life of integrity?” George Santayana ties integrity to a person’s choice of a direction in life, noting, “Our character...is an omen of our destiny, and the more integrity we have and keep, the simpler and nobler that destiny is likely to be.” But, reader beware. Santayana’s “simpler and nobler” does not infer insignificance. Instead, for many, it will mean the opposite. As Charles Simmons wrote, “Integrity is the first step to true greatness. Men love to praise, but are slow to practice it. To maintain it in high places costs self-denial; in all places it is liable to opposition, but its end is glorious, and the universe will yet do it homage.” American author Grenville Kleiser believed “You are already of consequence in the world if you are known as a man of strict integrity” To spur the integrity seeker on to greater heights, Robert E. Quinn chimes in with the observation, “It is our hypocrisy and self-focus that drains us. When we become purpose centered, internally directed other focused and externally open, we discover energy we didn’t know we had."

It is not by coincidence that to achieve that of which Quinn speaks to, one’s efforts will require the building of trust with ourselves and others. As noted earlier, integrity is built upon the other core values; trust being one of the most important. In their book, The Art of Waking People Up, Kenneth Cloke and Joan Goldsmith wrote, "Trust is rebuilt by focusing not on what the other person did or did not do but on critiquing one's own behavior, improving one's trustworthiness, and focusing attention not on words and promises but on actions, attitudes, and ways of being." The late, great, commentator, Edward R. Murrow was speaking along these same lines when he stated, "To be persuasive we must be believable; to be believable we must be credible; to be credible we must be truthful." Or, as George Eliot recommended, “Keep true, never be ashamed of doing right, decide on what you think is right and stick to it.” The charge will often seem unfair, and even overwhelming at times, but we will do well to remember Moliere’s observation, "If everyone were clothed with integrity, if every heart were just, frank, and kindly, the other virtues would be well-nigh useless." And although it may not “help pay the bills,” Denis Waitley believes, "A life lived with integrity - even if it lacks the trappings of fame and fortune is a shining star in whose light others may follow in the years to come."

If there is a “down” side to integrity, it would be that it comes with a cost. In fact, the cost that is exacted upon the person of integrity, at times, can seem high and disproportionate to the reward it bestows upon the individual. However, as Margaret Chase Smith reminds us, “Moral cowardice that keeps us from speaking our minds is as dangerous to this country as irresponsible talk. The right way is not always the popular and easy way. Standing for right when it is unpopular is a true test of moral character.” Our society seems to dissuade the individual from taking the unpopular stand, to be the “exception to the rule.” Lorraine Hansberry says it well in her statement, “The thing that makes you exceptional, if you are at all, is inevitably that which makes you lonely.” Perhaps we can find some solace in the words of Wilma Mankiller: “One of the things my parents taught me, and I'll always be grateful for the gift, is to not ever let anybody else define me.” The words of A. A. Milne should also inspire us to risk the potential consequences of attempting to rise above the maelstrom of conventional human thought: “The third-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the majority. The second-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the minority. The first-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking.” Keep heart! There will be times along the way to living an exceptional life that will challenge your will and forbearance. During such times, as best you can, stand solid and reflect on the following words of M. Scott Peck: “The whole course of human history may depend on a change of heart in one solitary and even humble individual - for it is in the solitary mind and soul of the individual that the battle between good and evil is waged and ultimately won or lost.

" To go against the dominant thinking of your friends,

of most of the people you see every day,

is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform."

~Theodore H. White

Lest the integrity seeker becomes discouraged or disillusioned, let’s consider Ayn Rand’s perspective on integrity when she stated, “Achievement of your happiness is the only moral purpose of your life, and that happiness, not pain or mindless self-indulgence, is the proof of your moral integrity, since it is the proof and the result of your loyalty to the achievement of your values.” Shea Vaughn, notes in the Five Living Principles, “Integrity does not examine the result – only the effort made. It is the level of honesty in the quality of effort you give to the execution of whatever you strive to do – it has to be the best you can do.” Also, living a life with/of integrity might, at times, be better served through silence and solitude as Meister Eckhart suggested when he wrote, “In silence man can most readily preserve integrity.” If you dare to choose silence and go “deeper” consider the pathway Charles B. Johnson chose. Johnson notes, “Writing is my refuge. It's where I go. It's where I find that integrity I have.” Emerson would appear to summarize these latter thoughts quiet well in his statement, "There is a time in every man's education when he arrives at the conviction that envy is ignorance; that imitation is suicide; that he must take himself for better for worse as his portion . . . It is the harder because you will always find those who think they know what is your duty better than you know it. It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.

Again, as with the other entries, we must ask how all that we have addressed thus far is of major consequence to our dealings, and interactions, with children. Obviously, at least to this writer, if we prefer our children to grow into people of integrity then it is our obligation and duty to teach them the meaning(s) and purpose(s) of integrity as it applies to the human experience. Hopefully, it goes without saying, that we, as teachers, must be able to demonstrate, as well as orchestrate, the lessons we are attempting to teach. If we are not people of integrity, how can we convincingly teach those qualities and attributes to others. We must not be included among the ranks of those that Margaret Mead speaks to when she stated, "What people say, what people do, and what they say they do are entirely different things." If we believe that the future of the human race - at least a future worthy of our aspiration - is important then we must strive to be that "diamond among the glass" that Ragnar speaks to. Yes, the task at hand is big, but not too big. It is difficult, but not too difficult. Indeed, in many ways it will define who and what we are, and where and how we will land in the future. Each of us is an architect helping to design a future world. Are you ready and willing to join in the project? Or, are you planning to sit this one out?

“The hero is one who kindles a great light in the world,

who sets up blazing torches in the dark streets of life for men to see by.

The saint is the man who walks through the dark paths of the world,

himself a light.”

~Felix Adler